If you think the competition of modern day sports is intense, imagine playing games that could actually cost you your life. These ancient sporting events are some of the most violent competitions ever known to mankind.
Pitz
Pitz was a Mesoamerican ball game played predominantly by the Maya thousands of years ago. The game was simple enough – the goal was to keep a 10 pound rubber ball from touching the ground. Oh yeah, sometimes the Maya used an actual human head instead of a ball. As creepy as that sounds, I’m pretty sure the Maya didn’t focus too much on that minor detail since the penalty for the losing team was being put to death.
Skin Pulling
It’s no secret that the Vikings were a pretty brutal bunch. They raped, pillaged, and plundered as freely as they desired, but sometimes even that gets old. To spice things up a bit, the Vikings invented a game called Skin Pulling. Think tug of war with animal hides over an open flame. The stakes of the game? Well, naturally, the losers were burnt alive in the fiery pit while the winners to got to go on and rape, pillage, and plunder to their heart’s content.
Venatio
The name might sound regal and worldly, but the game was of course sadistic, bloody, and just plain abusive to animals. Roman soldiers would bring back dangerous animals from the far corners of the expansive empire and stick them in the Colosseum where they would fight armed humans to the death. These bloodbaths weren’t even considered marquee events at the Colosseum, they were merely opening acts for gladiator duels.
Bull Leaping
Anyone a fan of leap frog? In ancient times, bull leaping was a popular sport in Crete as well as the Middle East. The premise was pretty basic: you get a bull nice and pissed, then direct run straight for it as fast as you can. The notion is to leap over the bull while it bucks its head as it tries to impale you. That should give you enough momentum to do some cool acrobatic tricks before landing on the ground and running for your life. That’s where this one gets violent, any misstep and the bull would have you for dinner.
Naumachia
This twisted game was a popular one, especially under the reign of Emperor Nero. Essentially, the Roman Empire would fill up massive amphitheaters with tons of water, then place boats manned by thousands of war prisoners into said amphitheater. The POWs would then engage in naval battle until they were all dead. Thousands of people watch for entertainment, and were totally cool with war prisoners being forced to murder each other since they were sentenced to death anyways.
Fisherman’s Joust
Medieval knight jousting has nothing on Egypt’s fisherman’s joust. Back in ancient times when the Nile was chalk-full of deadly crocodiles and even deadlier hippos, contestants would row wooden rafts out to the middle of the river and proceed to try to and beat each other dead or into the water, which, for all intents and purposes, was the same thing.
The Gladiator Games
Remember how venation was merely an opening act for the main attraction? Well, here are the big boys. Gladiator games, simply put, were a horrific scourge on the history of humanity. The Romans would force slaves, surrendered enemies, criminals and just about anyone else they could into amphitheaters like the Colosseum and watch them fight to the death – all for people’s entertainment. It was especially disturbing considering that most of the time the individuals forced to participate were fighting against highly trained soldiers and stood virtually no chance of surviving.
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